I got fired
That is a message you don’t want to bring home to your spouse. Fortunately, I didn’t have to do that. It was a message given to both of us from a marriage counselor. In his office, at our last meeting.
Susan and I have been married 39 years and that happened at about year 10 or so. We had decided we wanted a better marriage and some friends had recommended Jim as a counselor. It started out ok but rapidly descended into a very dark time.
Jim had the opinion that Susan and I would end up in divorce and after meeting with us a few times didn’t see another option. Susan and I were determined to avoid divorce since we’d both been through that and felt it was not something we wanted for us or our kids. We refused to quit and felt there had to be another answer.
I think Jim was afraid because we had said divorce was not an option but homicide was still on the table and I suspect he felt he’d somehow be held responsible. Kidding but not kidding. We were serious about fixing our situation.
That was a tough time but honestly, I’m really glad we stuck it out. I can’t imagine life without her.
So, what’s the point of me telling you this?
The point is you sometimes have to fire your coach, mentor, counselor, guide or whatever you call them because they can’t help you. It does not mean you can’t be helped. Thankfully Jim knew his limitation and whether it was fear of responsibility or just him knowing his limits, he did us a big favor that night.
After Jim fired us that night we got a referral to another counselor. David was younger but much wiser and gave us a perspective that changed everything. I’d be happy to share that if you want but it’s not the point of this story. (email me if you want the rest of that story)
If you’re feeling stuck with your current situation you need to examine your options. Are you in the wrong company, on the wrong team, doing the wrong things or maybe working with the wrong coach? It might not be you or your fault but it’s your fault if you stay in the same situation hoping for a different result.
Do you need a new perspective? It is perspective at the end of the day which changes everything without changing any of the facts.
Here is an example of a changed perspective. The photographer locked their camera on the Milky Way and let it rotate with the Earth. Check it out.
Let me clear one thing up here. I am not a coach and I’m not trying to recruit you. I just wanted to get you to thinking and I’ll invite you to comment or email me. I’m happy to engage in conversation to see if I can help with a different perspective. Give me a call or email me.